*From God’s loving heart into our grateful arms*
How sweet to hold a newborn baby,
And feel the pride and joy he brings;
But greater still the calm assurance:
This child can face uncertain days because He Lives!
My favourite words from one of my favourite hymns. Words filled with hope and comfort.
I have always loved babies. I was and still am most comfortable around kids than adults. So, when I got married at 23 years, the natural expectation was a baby in a few years. However, God’s plan for us was different.
Right from a young age, I have struggled with PCOS. During those days, the awareness was less and the treatments ineffective. This resulted in multiple doctor visits and a general fear of hospitals. We started consulting with a gynaecologist after a few years of marriage. Inspite of multiple scans, long queues, late night doctor visits, and a laparoscopic procedure there was still no progress. And our hearts were never at peace during all this. We even walked out of a fertility centre that was recommended to us without meeting the doctor. Or rather, God pulled us out since it was not what He had in mind for us. Since the hospital visits were taking a toll on me, at one point, we decided to stop all treatments. And life went on, busy with Church, work, family and friends.
However, there was a desire, deep down in my heart. When I was little, I have heard my Amma talk about adoption as something she wanted to do. That small seed probably took root and I wished to adopt even if we had biological children. When I shared this with my husband, he was immediately on board and we prayerfully took the decision to register for adoption. Our parents and siblings were also supportive when we broke the news to them. It felt like God had prepared their hearts, along with ours, to accept this decision.
Then began the long and daunting process of legal adoption through CARA. God showed us a very supportive social worker Uncle who helped and guided us throughout. We were initially told that the wait time would 1.5 to 2 years. I used to open the portal everyday to check how many referrals went out. I joined a prospective adoptive parents group where more details were shared. As things were progressing and the waiting list numbers slowly reducing, Covid hit us in full force. The entire process came to a halt. Our priorities and prayers changed. After almost a year, with everything slowly coming back to normal, the numbers started moving again. In a world where we get everything instantly, this period of waiting was challenging but the knowledge of God’s perfect timing kept us going.
After a long wait of more than 3 years, our daughter came to us a few months before our 10th wedding anniversary. I vividly remember the referral message, I was in a daily call with my team and the message suddenly popped up. I was so excited and immediately called my husband. As we read in James 1:17, “Every good and perfect gift is from above”. She was indeed perfect and surprisingly, from my husband’s hometown. The next few weeks were a whirlwind of preparation and anticipation. And the day finally arrived to go meet her and bring her home. It was love at first sight for all of us. She captivated us with her huge eyes and open smile. Our hearts filled with gratitude and praise. We named her “Giana”, meaning God is gracious. She reminds us every moment of God’s abundant grace in our lives.
The journey of parenting, though very challenging has also been rewarding. In an age of information overload, we trust in the one constant, the word of God that is teaching us every day. “If you want your children to grow up in a Christian home, make sure Christ is at home”, a valuable parenting lesson that reminds us to keep assessing our priorities. We thank God for our daughter and seek His continual guidance in bringing her up in His ways, to love and serve like Jesus.
I strongly believe that God takes us through every experience for a reason. It is all a part of His perfect purpose for us. Though our story might seem like a happy one, when compared to others, through it God has taught us to truly empathise and understand the pain, yearning and hope that fills the hearts of those waiting to be parents. At a time when adoption is still a taboo is many homes, I view our journey as a means to reach out to people like us and to guide, help and support those considering it.
Trust in God, in His timing, in His plans that are always greater than your own.
Seek His guidance, strength and grace as you navigate the unknown.
Place your desires and your future into His loving hands.
Rest in the hope that He has absolutely everything in control.
